Love Purgatory

Love purgatory.

How apt.

Wrong love, wrong time.

Perfectly apt.

"Maybe you dated briefly, maybe you had a full-fledged relationship or maybe, you have never been officially together.

The connection with this person is so real and strong and magnetic that you are constantly pulled back. The relationship hasn’t reached its potential yet, so it can’t be over."

I think that is my issue. I felt that our relationship was stillborn. And in my grand scheme of things, it was just about to fly since I had time to spend with you, but you thwarted my plans and killed it like a termination before the first trimester. So it hurt. A lot. You'll never know how much you hurt me. And there was I, thinking that I would never want to fall in love because it ends in hurt. Always. And yes, I am right.

Again.

Though I would really, like really, not want to be right, this time.

But it IS getting better. There's now just a dull ache where there once was sharp pain. And I am sure that in time, that will lose its edge and there will be no feelings left. The fact that I haven't written here for a few days is testament that things are changing. Although it doesn't reveal that I have been scanning your facebook AND instagram like a neurotic stalker. Hah.

Going back to the article about love purgatory, I differ from the author in that I do not wish to be with you anymore. You told me once, I am of value. I agree. I am worth more than what you discarded me for.

Much more.